Translated from Arabic, the speaker stated that “the blood of our brothers has saturated the sand and has polluted the water we drink. We now ask for peace and will assure Western nations that our jihad is finished. As part of the accord, we will relinquish our firearms and will await diplomatic messengers from the West. The bleeding sunset will finally set and we now await the crisp breeze of the morning.”
The live broadcast was watched all around the Middle East causing widespread celebration from Riyadh to Islamabad.
Concurrently, the live feed was being watched and traced by American security forces.
“While most feeds are disconnected before the coordinates of origination are discovered, this one was kept live,” commented a defense official whose identity will remain anonymous. “Airborne assets were immediately redirected to the location. Due to ongoing air strikes in a nearby town, it only took a period of few minutes from communication to enemy contact.”
Viewers of the video only had a few seconds to process the series of events.
There was a low rumble that made the dialogue impossible to comprehend, a shockwave that blew the windows from a nearby ordinance, and then static white noise.
“Normal operations resumed right after what we assumed was a successful operation.”
“A week later we watched the same feed rebroadcasted on regional propaganda sources. I just remember the anchors having a unsettled look.”
The Department of Defense inevitably released a statement apologizing for the misunderstanding. Following the incident several positions were posted on government job boards that required fluency in Arabic.
“Like most people, we have never listened to a terrorist video translated to English. Translators are expensive to employ and we rarely need to know what they’re saying. We organize them by their clothes and their background. The black outfits with the pirate flags are ISIS. Turbans and goats are Taliban. Plain white attire and calm appearance is Al-Qaeda. Regardless of who they are or what they’re saying, they are all terrorists and will be dealt with accordingly.”